Author: Scott Adamson

MLS Cup rematch is set

By Scott Adamson
Adamsonmedia.com

The 2017 MLS Cup will be another one just like the other one.

With Toronto FC’s 1-0 victory over Columbus on Wednesday and Seattle’s 3-0 shellacking of Houston last night, the Major League Soccer championship will be a rematch of the 2016 finals.

In 2016 Seattle had to go to a shootout to top Toronto at BMO Field and claim its first MLS title, and the teams and the setting is the same for next Saturday’s 4 p.m. showdown in Canada.

Toronto, the league’s only 20-game winner in the regular season, secured its spot in the Cup when Jozy Altidore scored in the 60th minute to top the Crew.

The squads played to a scoreless draw in the first leg of the Eastern Conference finals and it took Altidore’s tally in the second leg to book passage to the final match of the campaign.

Things were much less dramatic for the Sounders, who held a 2-0 lead against Houston after the first leg and just needed to play keep away in the second Western Conference final showdown.

Instead Seattle poured it on, with Victor Rodriguez, Clint Dempsey and Will Bruin all scoring to give Seattle a 5-0 aggregate and a chance to defend its crown.

While the Sounders displayed plenty of offensive firepower in winning the West, keeper Tyler Miller logged another clean sheet. Incredibly, the Sounders have not conceded a postseason goal since the first leg of the 2016 conference finals.

The scoreless streaks for Seattle’s opposition in playoff competition stands at 647 minutes, while in 2017 it hasn’t allowed a goal in 542 minutes.

Brian Schmetzer’s footballers blanked their last two regular season foes and every opponent so far in the 2017 postseason.

EXPANSION CANDIDATES ANNOUNCED

MLS plans to expand to 28 franchises in the coming years, and Los Angeles FC will become the 23rd club to play in the league when it starts up in 2018. A Miami entry will possibly join the league in the near future.

The next wave of expansion, however, will bring MLS up to 26 teams ­– and the finalists for those two positions were announced on Wednesday.

Cincinnati, Detroit, Nashville and Sacramento are the four cities which were culled from 12 groups that submitted formal bids back in January.

The remaining candidates will make their presentations Dec. 6 and eight days later the MLS Board of Governors will meet with current league members to discuss expansion.

“The leaders of the Cincinnati, Detroit, Nashville and Sacramento MLS expansion ownership groups have bold visions and innovative plans for their clubs, stadiums and their involvement in their respective communities,” MLS commissioner Don Garber said in a statement. “We are pleased these highly-respected business and sports leaders have been so determined to bring Major League Soccer to their cities. We have been greatly encouraged by the progress that all four of these groups have made and we are looking forward to their presentations.”

The other 12 markets that applied were Charlotte, Indianapolis, Phoenix, Raleigh/Durham, St. Louis, San Antonio, San Diego and Tampa/St. Petersburg.

In addition, an ownership group led by David Beckham, which is trying to put a franchise back in Miami, is still considered likely to be added as the 24th franchise.

Beckham’s involvement has been ongoing for several years and was not part of the expansion process.

WORLD CUP DRAW HELD

Much of the soccer-loving world watched the draw for the 2018 World Cup this morning, but ratings in the United States were likely down.

Way down.

The U.S., of course, failed to qualify, but 31 other countries did and they, along with host Russia, were placed in eight groups of four during Friday’s ceremony in Moscow.

Russia will open the World Cup when it plays Saudi Arabia on June 14 in a match featuring the two lowest-ranked teams in the field.

Some intriguing first round matchups include defending World Cup champion Germany against Mexico and Spain vs. Portugal.

Below is the complete list of groups for next summer’s event.

 

Don’t act old and never wear jorts

When I was a little kid, I thought my parents were ancient.

Brain Farce is an alleged humor column written by Scott Adamson. It comes out basically whenever he feels like writing it. Follow him on Twitter @adamsonsl

My father was 43 and my mother, 34, when I was born, so once I was a teenager, Pop was already in his mid-50s and mom in her mid-40s.

I couldn’t imagine ever getting that “old.”

But guess what?

I’m 56, and on New Year’s Eve, I’ll be 57. If young people now look at me the way I once looked at people my age … well, they’re wrong.

The late, great Satchel Paige said, “Age is a case of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it don’t matter.” Forget for a moment that he’s dead, which negates the argument somewhat … that’s a really cool quote.

And now, it’s a rallying cry for me. Although I can’t stop you from thinking I’m old, I sure as hell can stop me from thinking I’m old.

Sadly, there are men my age who perpetuate the stereotype that makes us all look ancient and out of touch, and I’d like to address that if I may.

For starters, we should never wear “jorts” – at any time, under any circumstance.

Jorts, of course, are blue jean shorts. I’m pretty sure they were created as a joke, but enough jackasses took the joke seriously that jorts became a thing. I cringe every time I see some poor bastard running around in truncated denim.

You’re not Daisy Duke, buddy, so go home and change.

Then there are sandals (or mandals).

I, for one, never have and never will wear sandals. I think they look ridiculous on men. If you’re wandering around the Middle East healing people then I guess they’re OK, but otherwise nobody wants to see man toes.

And the whole socks worn with sandals thing is horrifying in its own way.

Mandals, I assume, exist to let the pigs breathe, so socks defeat the entire purpose.

Here’s a rule of thumb; if you wear socks with sandals, you’re going to look like a dumbass.

Remember the wisdom of Batman: “It’s not who I am underneath, but what I do that defines me.” No one wants to be defined by wearing socks and sandals.

Also, don’t wear really bright white athletic shoes with really bright white socks, or dress shoes and dark socks with shorts.

The latter is more an issue with men in their late 60s and beyond, but I’ve noticed the former among my age group.

I can’t quite put my finger on what makes the bright white sock/shoe combo scream “old,” but it does.

On a related note, don’t call athletic shoes “sneakers” or “tennis shoes.” Both terms will result in getting at least one check on the old man box. In fact, just be aware of language in general any time you’re around millennials. For example, when they use the word “cornhole,” just know that it doesn’t mean what you think it means.

Music choices are also a sign of aging.

I’m proud to say I’m a fan of modern alternative music, and there is not a day that goes by when I don’t listen to the Ramones and AC/DC. So if you tend to skew towards 1970s “light rock” or “soft rock” or whatever they call that crap, we can never be friends.

Playing an Air Supply or Bread song calls for an ass-kicking … I’m just telling you.

And when you talk about the old days (mainly the 1970s and 1980s), do it either ironically or as a point of reference.

Don’t long for them.

When you say something like, “I remember back when there were only three TV channels and we didn’t have remote controls … we had to get up and change the channels manually,” no one cares.

There are also people who remember polio, Joseph McCarthy and a thin Orson Welles, but there’s no real point in bringing all that up now.

Look – I’m not running from my age. I get that I’m in the third quarter of the football game of my life. Still, I don’t feel old.

I’m in better physical shape now than I was 20 years ago.

My mind is still relatively sharp – I’ve yet to wander out onto the porch naked (unless it was planned), and I only forget to shower once or twice a year.

But more importantly, I don’t walk around in jorts and mandals, sing along with Neal Sedaka, or talk about how the 1970s were a simpler, better time.

I’ve gotten older, but I haven’t gotten old.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m gonna crank up “Back In Black” as loud as it’ll go before watching “Matlock” and then taking a nap.

Oh, Canada, you bring great football joy

The title game of the NFL is still nine weeks away, but North America’s other major professional outdoor football league crowned its champion on Sunday.

Out of Left Field is written by Scott Adamson. It appears weekly and sometimes more frequently if he gets up in the middle of the night and can’t go back to sleep. Follow him on Twitter @adamsonsl

And it’s going to be really, really hard for Super Bowl LII to match it.

The 105th Grey Cup featured the Calgary Stampeders (14-5-1) and Toronto Argonauts (10-9), the last teams standing in the Canadian Football League.

By the end of a spectacular, snowy night before 36,154 fans at TD Place in Ottawa, Toronto was 11-9 and owners of an amazing 27-24 victory.

How amazing?

Try a 100-yard pass play to account for the Argonauts’ first score of the game, and a 109-yard return of a fumble for a touchdown that flipped the contest from a sure Stampeders win to a thrilling comeback – and upset.

With Calgary leading 24-16 and threatening inside the Toronto 10, Kamar Jordan caught a pass, but fumbled while trying to squeeze his way closer to the end zone. Cassius Vaughn picked up the loose cargo at his own 1 and took it to the house.

The 2-point conversion tied the game, and then Lirim Hajrullahu kicked a 32-yard, game-winning field goal with 49 seconds to play.

I have no idea how many other people in the United States besides me watched last night, but those who didn’t missed out on something special. It was the culmination of another great year in a great league, one that receives little attention here but has my full attention once its regular season begins in the summer.

I’ll even go so far as to say I usually enjoy the Grey Cup more than the Super Bowl: this was the sixth of the last seven CFL championships decided by a touchdown or less.

And it’s significant to note that the game is played while it’s still gridiron season. Quite frankly, by the time the NFL hits the first Sunday in February, I’ve been ready for football to be over for a month. It doesn’t help matters that the Super Bowl has become an overblown TV production with far too many extended timeouts and a lengthy halftime that disrupts the flow of the game.

Of course the Grey Cup halftime was extended from the usual 14 minutes to 28 (Shania Twain was the featured performer, arriving via dogsled), but that’s OK.

The game itself, which started around 6:40 p.m. EST, clicked right along at a snappy pace, and Toronto players were awash in confetti three hours later.

For American fans tuning in for the first time, they might not have recognized a lot of the names and faces in the contest.

Calgary’s QB is Bo Levi Mitchell, who started his college career at SMU and finished at Eastern Washington. Last year’s league MVP (or Most Outstanding Player, as the CFL calls the honor), Mitchell threw for 5,073 yards and 25 touchdowns in the 2017 season.

The Stamps also had a 1,000-yard rusher in Jerome Messam (1,078 yards) and Marquay McDaniel was the top receiver on the team with 906 yards.

Toronto was led by longtime CFL signal caller Ricky Ray, who amassed 5,843 yards and tossed 29 TDs through 19 contests. His title game stat line was 19-32-0 for 297 yards and a TD in what might have been his pro football curtain call.

S.J. Green was Ray’s favorite target during the year – to the tune of 1,518 receiving yards – and James Wilder was an effective runner for the Argos with 885 yards on the ground.

On this night it was former Ohio State standout DeVier Posey who took MVP honors, catching seven balls for 175 yards and a touchdown.

Ray became the first CFL starting quarterback in history to win four Grey Cups, and he did it at the ripe young age of 38.

Successful quarterbacks in the CFL will always put up dazzling numbers, because when you have just three downs to make 10 yards, you’ll throw the ball a lot.

But I’ve already been over the rules (check out my column from Nov. 9), which are peculiar to those unfamiliar with the Canadian game but terrific once you get used to them.

Look, I get that it’s hard for some Americans to warm up to this brand of “international” football.

The NFL is the top-tier of the game, and NCAA football is wildly popular.

Just as there are people who can walk and chew gum at the same time, though, some of us can enjoy CFL, NFL and NCAA football all at once, too.

And Sunday – for me – Canadian football took center stage.

I’m already looking forward to its return next June.