Animal activity

A while back we were doing some purging and downsizing, so it seemed like a good time to donate items to a local thrift store. This particular organization was in need of everything from clothes to working appliances to household furnishings, and among other things we had shirts, dresses and a decent toaster to pass along.

The big-ticket items, though, were a couple of area rugs we decided to part with.

Scott Adamson writes stuff. Follow him on Twitter @adamsonsl

Both were in good shape – although we’d had them for a few years – but in our current domicile they simply didn’t fit. So, we rolled them up and left them out for pickup along with the more traditional donations.

Well, the clothes and toaster were picked up immediately, but the rugs were left behind.

Not only that, there was a note attached to them: “We are unable to use these as there are signs of animal activity.”

I found this message rather cryptic. I mean, what kind of activities do they think my animals have been engaging in?

Are these activities specific to the rugs?

Should I be concerned?

As you might know we have two dogs (Charlie and Steve) and two cats (Bane and Thor), and more often than not they’re in the same room with us. But when we sleep, we don’t know with any degree of certainty what they might be doing, so this is probably when they were engaging in activities on the rug.

What were they doing, I wondered?

They enjoy playing 5 Card Stud, but that’s usually done at the dining room table. I can’t count the times I’ve had to get up in the middle of the night and tell Steve to put his cigar out.

Maybe they were using the Ouija Board. Both Bane and Thor have a fascination with the occult – it’s a cat thing – and there have been several times they’ve roped Charlie into playing with them.

Ever since they held a séance and scared him, though, he’s pretty much stayed away from the dark arts.

Twister? Yeah, a rug is probably a good place to put down the Twister mat, especially since it would probably slide around on the hardwood floors.

But we don’t have a Twister game in the house and the only animal that could’ve bought one is Steve. However, once we found out he’d subscribed to a pair of Chihuahua swinger sites, we took his credit card away. (He’s six now and old enough to make his own decisions, but not with our money).

Frankly, we were at a loss until we studied the note a bit closer. It did say there were “signs” of animal activity.

Did the signs come in the form of a vision?

Had they been foretold in quatrains written by Nostradamus … or in this case, Nostradogus?

A canine eats new food

Yet his stomach hits a snag

An ingredient causes stress

Now his itchy butt will drag

Perhaps one or more of our critters had left a coded message that the thrift shop workers could see but we could not. I suppose they might have one of those ultraviolet light instruments that are used during crime scene investigations. Although invisible to the naked eye, they shine it on the rug and reveal such phrases as, “This is where Bane peed,” “This is where Charlie pooped,” “This is where Thor barfed,” and “This is where Steve spilled his high gravity beer.”

Truth is, we might never really know what kind of activity was so egregious that our used (yet still quite functional) rugs were passed over.

However, there is a bright side.

I have since moved the rugs to the large storage area attached to our garage, where they now have new life decorating the floor. And considering our animals have never been to that area of our property, then the area rugs should be free from their activity going forward.

Unless, of course, Steve learns the code to the garage door opener.

Then all bets are off.